I have decided to come clean. I am a big fat liar (or, honestly, a skinny-fat liar). Today is Valentine’s Day, and love is in the air. It might be a disease (see 2/11’s post), but everyone seems to like it nonetheless.

So how could I not take this opportunity to profess my deep affection? There is, in fact, a special someone in my life. Me. And the thoughtful me in this relationship got me a chocolate and caramel-covered apple with cute tiny hearts on it.

I feel so special. :)

“Ohhh, you shouldn’t have,” he says to himself. “I mean, you just bought five pounds of black licorice Allsorts. Where do you think all of this sugar is going?”

But in this case, there’s an apple somewhere beneath all of that chocolate. So, you know, it’s healthy! That’s how this works, right?

To celebrate this holiday, Octoralis—from my Arachnomancer series—has made you a card. Printed behind her paper cutout is a cute scribbling in arachling, the language of spiders. I’ll translate it for you.

“I love… how you taste.”

Umm, please take that within context. She’s not “that” type of spider… And with that, have a wonderful Valentine’s!