I'm a Fudging Vampire! Beta Release

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I'm a Fudging Vampire! Beta Release banner
By Dustin Tigner
Too Long; Didn't Read

Want to grab my latest book for free? Download the beta version of I’m a Fudging Vampire! Does That Mean I Sparkle? and read on any device: Kindle, Kobo, mobile phone, or even print out the PDF if you want. Or wait and get the final version this September!

The beta is over. Get the full version! Links below.

After nearly eleven months, my next book is finally done (mostly). As promised, I’m releasing it to my newsletter for free. But more than that, I’m going to keep the book free until November 30th, 2022.

If you want to know why, scroll down to the next section.


I’m a Fudging Vampire! is a standalone prequel.

This bookworm-to-badass story follows Sarah, Olindale’s first vampire, in an adventure that transcends heavens. It’s chock full of interesting game mechanics, laugh-out-loud situations, whacky characters, and mysteries.

Eight years before Dhane became an Arachnomancer, Sarah snuffed it, expired, breathed her last breath—also known as died, if you need it spelled out—in the most unlikely of places: at the library.

But do not fret! This is perfectly normal.

What is not normal, however, is the persistence of one’s soul after shuffling off this mortal coil.

To break the Cycle is strange and wrong and perverse. It goes against the very nature of existence: that which lives must eventually be recycled (responsibly).

Lucky or unlucky, Sarah finds herself Cycle-broken and very much alive, depending on how strict you wish to be with the definition.

This is heaven! A wondrous, magical place full of the fantastical. But no amount of reading about adventurers in far-off lands could prepare her for . . . this.

Turns out, heaven has a return policy better than Costco. And souls are terribly expensive. If she doesn’t win the forthcoming challenges, she is to be flushed back to the Primordial Sea of Souls, back to the Cycle to eventually be reincarnated as whatever the RNG gods have in store for her: a slug, most likely.

Why Free?

As an author, the most important thing is my ability to contact my readers when I have new books available.

Amazon is a double-edged sword. They have helped me sell thousands of books, but since they withhold my readers' contact information, they have made me entirely dependent on them to succeed. And success feels random.

If Amazon favors my blood sacrifice, money rains down from the heavens, and I can keep writing these fun books. If not, doom and gloom.

I’m trading Sarah’s book for your email address. This, to me, is worth what I would normally charge for this book: $4.99. Of course, you’re welcome to unsubscribe at any time. But I hope you don’t. :)


As of 2022, there are 1.7 million new indie-published books each year. The great majority of these books don’t expire like the books of old that only made money while they were in print. eBooks are digital and everlasting.

There are so many books that just fall into the void. Successful authors have had to make marketing a core part of their business or risk their everlasting eBooks becoming buried beneath millions of others all wanting attention.

When I first wrote Arachnomancer, I was down to the last few months of my savings. Everything I did with that book was to maximize profits. My total cost was $65 to register the copyright.

I couldn’t afford to grow my fanbase back then. All income went toward keeping the writing dream alive. Not a cent went toward advertising or art or editing. I donned all the different hats and did everything myself to keep costs low.

And what a learning experience it has been!

Now, I’m in a position to grow my business. Sarah’s book is at the heart of a new marketing machine I am building. Once done, it’ll run passively forever and free up my time to focus on writing more stories faster.

This is how I’m fighting obscurity. It has taken a long time to understand this business and make the necessary changes to better succeed in the future, a future that will only get tougher for my creative brothers and sisters.

Thank You!

Despite the impossibility of you finding my books—mere needles in a massive, evergrowing haystack—you’re here. That’s awesome. Thank you so much for joining me on this crazy adventure.

Now, before you forget, go grab Sarah’s book.

See you around!